miatan: Life Magnified

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Wed
18
Jun '08

Everyday Rob People

Back in the good old days when I was much much younger, I remember Daddy sending Mummy to work in our old family merc, near the old Ellenbourough Market by the river.

I’ll always insist on tagging along.
Car rides were fun when you were much smaller.
Now that I’m older, car rides are still fun except that the car has to go much faster than my dad’s legal speed limit.

I remember at that exact same spot, where the current ERP gantry stands, there was a tiny cubicle by the side of the road, guarded by a mata.
I use the term cubicle because I’d always thought it a portable toilet cubicle for the mata to pee while on duty.

C’mon. I was 5 la ok.
In those days, we not so high tech, not so informed ok!
But I’m pretty darn sure we had much more imagination than kids these days.

Annnyyywaaay, there was a ruling back then, that cars need to ferry at least 3 people before they are allowed to enter the CBD during peak hours.

So every morning, I would bring my life size teddy (I wasn’t so tall then and the teddy seemed to be my size. the 80s kind with flat plastic stick-on eyes that has black round plastics inside as rolly pupils) for the car ride and when we drive past the gantry, i would stick my face and the bear at the rear passenger window and wave!

Firstly, I was scared of getting arrested by the mata. Too many childhood threats of the police coming to take me away if I was naughty.

Secondly, I was still scared. Scared that that the mata won’t see me seated at the back. Like I said, I wasn’t so tall then.

Thirdly, I was also scared that the mata won’t count me as a “full” passenger.
See, when I was 5, I’ve already grasped the concept of fractions, thanks to the educational chart at the back of taxis.

That’s why I brought Mr Teddy along.
I figured two small people makes 1 “full” person, just like the chart says.

Nowadays with Electronic Road Pricing, Mr Teddy gets to remain in his cupboard.
Basically, the motive of the additional ERP gantrys is to ease traffic and not sucker our citizens’ money right?

So, how about we revert back to the good old “min-3-pple-in-a-car” ruling?

It will encourage car pooling, thereby bringing people together and reducing the number of cars on the road.
Which in turn reduces fuel consumption and then reduces pollution and then reduces global warming and then it will be my cue to jump out and say WORLD PEACE!

Sun
8
Jun '08

Role Play Me

I’ve dated many gamers. Countless.

Unreal Tournament, Diablo, World of Warcraft, Streets of London, Age of Conan, you name it i’ve dated it.

And no, I don’t date Counter Strike Bengs.

I only date REAL MEN who play REAL ROLE-PLAYING GAMES.

These men are PASSIONATE (about their game), STEADFAST in love (with their online character) and LOYAL (to their battle mates).

All the traits I’ve checked off on a list for my perfect man.

Gamers almost never cheat on their partners. Because they have no time to.
They rush home after movies to battle with their team.
They hurry through dinner to complete a new mission.
They play well into the early hours of the morning, lacking sleep they result in grumpiness, short tempers, unkempt other halves.

It doesn’t take another physical human being to steal your boyfriend, it can also come in the form of a cyber character.

So as i frag one gamer boyfriend after another, they all still seem to respawn around me.

Like they say, if you can’t beat them, join them.

P.S i’ve always wondered, who’s they anyway?!