miatan: Life Magnified

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Tue
29
May '07

all the world’s a stage…….

And all the men and women…….merely players

Remember this Nokia Ad with Gary Oldman?


Well, here’s a better improved local version of it.

Damn blardee hilarious!!!

*bangs on table ah lian style, hysterical with laughter*


CONFLICT!

Sun
27
May '07

vrrooom….go on, take me out.

PIMP MY RIDE! RIDE MY PIMP!

I have been viewing alot of cars recently.

Yup.

But quite unlike those people who go test drive all the various cars over the weekend before finally selling their soul out to pay for the COE.

3 weeks back, the SAAB concept car launch.

An eco-friendly car that has a full 360 windscreen.

And on Friday night, that was one car viewing session that blew me away.

Headed to Millenia Walk for the TORQUE Supercars event, invites courtesy of Jules!


The prancing horse, Ferrari F430.


The Porsche Carrera GT.


The Lamborghini Akon sings about.


And the so very classic Ford GT.

And when Junita Simons needed a volunteer to sashay around this McLaren F1 beauty and end off with a Vanna White pose, guess who she picked?!

“You look like you could model around this McLaren quite easily. Come! What’s your name?”

“I’m Mia.”

“Ok Mia, what do you think of this car?”

(it so godamn fucking beautiful!) “It is absolutely gorgeous and I simply love the sound of the engine!”

“So sexy right? Alright, what if I tell you, that the prize I’m giving away is this car?”

(no waaay yes please!) “REALLY?! I’ve got a license!”

Didn’t get the keys but made away with a goodie bag of Zegna fragrance, AMG polo tee and Toblerones for that upclose encounter with the purring engine of the McLaren.

Grey Goose vodka was the main drinks sponsor that night and boy, did we help ourselves at the bar!

Grey Goose Orange on the rocks, cosmo martinis, Grey Goose straight up. woohoo.
And they’re all served in these funky G.G martini glasses complete with flying geese.



Guess limelight wasn’t the only thing I stole that night.

Tue
22
May '07

I’m a Pirate!

For someone who can’t swim to even keep afloat, i have about 6 sets of bikinis and i certainly hang around water alot.

Headed out to sea again at 1degree15 Sentosa on Sunday.
It was reportedly the hottest day in Singapore ever since Ice Age the movie.
I actually still felt the waves the next day. Or it could just be the hangover.

Brought my BRAND NEW SAMSUNG K3 mp3 player out with me.
I got it because I WILL BE HOSTING www.k3.uberme.com !!!!!!
How cool is that!! New mp3 player, i get to play online host, pick and select my favorite bloggers, feature them on a 3 months project stint!

We stopped for fuel before heading to an island near Kusu.

And on our way there, we saw the yacht of Howard, zee environmental recycling dude. Kinda witty, naming it the SeaShaw.

Unfortunately, while we were happily frolicking on the sands, we didn’t realise the boat have been washed ashore and BEACHED like a freaking whale.

Thankfully, there were other boaters nearby and they loaned a helping hand to push it back into the waves.

If not, we’ll probably stranded and have to live on the island for goodness knows how long, fending off dinosaurs that are breeding in the forest behind us and maybe start drawing on a volleyball and naming it William.

And i found Jack Sparrow’s compass!

It supposedly points towards what the holder’s heart most desires.

I wonder what, or who rather, will it point to if I held it.

Sun
20
May '07

Why a dog is (wo)Man’s best friend

Spent the whole of last week with 3 different dogs.

That’s more than the number of men I date in a week.

Meet COBY, my sister’s dog, who looks alot like Windsor.

And Cosworth, cozzie for short, who’s been to more countries than i have.

Here’s Bbop (pronounced bee bop)

Sick of those “Why a beer is better than a woman” jokes?

I’ve come to realise 5 good reasons why a dog is better than a man.

1) They come when you call.

No longer do you have to keep checking your handphone every 5 minutes, in hope to see a message from him, asking you out.
Now you just have to call out his name and you’ll see him running around the corner.

2) They are always eager to please and so much easier to please.

3) They are more handsome than most men i know, and better yet, while the other girls gush over him, you know he’ll ONLY go home with YOU.

4) They are also a WHOLE LOT smarter and obedient than most men, being able to understand basic commands like sit, lie down, shake hands and don’t pee all over the floor.

5) Last and at the very least, damn, we know that they are good with their tongue.

Sat
19
May '07

What’s your worth?

Scene: MRT Train Time: 9.00pm Mood: Relaxed

Ah Beng Boyfriend turns to Ah Lian in the crowded MRT train and says “Eh siao eh, if I win the S$10 million TOTO tomorrow ah, I give you S$2,000,000 lah, then we even liao hor. Quits liao. I don’t owe you, you don’t owe me right?”

Ah Lian blur blur look at him.
“Eh siao kia, U mean to say, if u strike it rich, you want to dump me ijit. U want to buy me out ijit? U think what? Retirement pension payout ah. What, 2 million talking you?”

A.B.B stutterly explained, “No la lian, you see ah, you say i’m your investment right? We together so long liao, 5 years leh, mai pray pray, you invest your youth in me wat. I know outside alot of Ah Sengs after you, all better than me somemore. So I thinking if i got money, 2 million give you, should be enough returns tio boh?”

Ah Lian, being an Ah Lian, is damn good in Maths and calculating.

“Eh. 2 million in 5 years. What kind of lousy returns is that. And hor, you say this meaning what? U measuring our relationship in dollars and sense ijit? Eh our relationship hor, not just invest time and youth leh, i also invest feeling leh, and alwas buy you presents think free one ah. And these investment for long term one wat. U think i want to cash out meh. What you mean, liddat?”

Money can buy romance but only love can buy me.

Am I too expensive?

I certainly hope not.

Fri
18
May '07

excuse me, sir……

Just a random dirty thought.

Most are …………… cock.

Some are …………… cockatoo.

A few are …………… cockadoodledoo.

What are you?

Thu
17
May '07

Mia’s Museum of Carebears

You may travel the world, but you’ve seen nothing like it.

Top L-R: Bedtime, Wish, Lotsa Heart, Cozy Heart, Secret, Bright Heart, Share
Middle L-R: Brave Heart, Funshine, Bedtime, Grumpy, Love-a-lot, Friend
Bottom L-R: Cheer, Birthday, Good Luck, Gramps, Baby Hugs, Funshine, Forest Friend

Behold, the largest collection of ancient cartoon stuffed bears, right here on Singapore shores.

20 carebears, of which almost half are in near perfect condition.

Painstakingly collected from all over the world.

Cheer is my very first carebear from childhood.
Love-a-lot was my second from Aaron.
Wish bear is my third, from PK.
Secret is a special bear because it tells you a secret.
Forest friend is a limited release.

And i’m not yet done collecting!

Wed
16
May '07

Next!

Im in a super duper good mood today.

Nothing can get me down.

Absolutely NOTHING.

Why?

Cause I just met the sweetest taxi driver in Singapore.

Can you believe my luck?

No seriously.

Can you?

I got into a taxi at 8.01pm.
I kiam siap lah, want to avoid $2 surcharge so i waited. Eh, 1min/$2 expensive know! And later the movie i watched reminds me what a difference a minute makes.

So the taxi uncle got into a conversation. You know lah, those taxi uncles can talk until cows come home.
He asked if I just got off work, so i said yea, but most of my colleagues are still working, i had to zhao cause i watching movie.
Then he said, “So you haven’t eaten la!”
No, i have not, got abit of gastric pain even.

He stopped at a traffic light, turned around and said “Na, take this biscuit. Uncle keep these in the car coz I got alot of passengers all never eat meals so i give them. Take, eat! You feel better.”

I took the packet he was waving at me and instantly i DID feel better.

Where got taxi uncle so nice one!! U tell me!!! WHERE GOT!

“Uncle, thank Q you ah. I eat later la, dont want later your taxi all got crumbs.”

“Aiya neh mind! eat eat!”

Then we spoke about life in Singapore, people work so hard, earn so little, housing so expensive, medicine also costs a kidney, the usual Singaporean gripe and about buying TOTO, 4D and striking lottery!

Just before I reached my destination at Shaw Centre, Gene called and changed the venue to Lucky Plaza and heng heng, he was able to filter into the turning lane jus 10 seconds before the traffic junction.

“Waaah, you bery lucky leh. Go lucky plaza, if late by 5 seconds uncle go straight liao, cannot turn ah!”
My cab fare came up to $5.10. I gave him the exact amount and he said “Aiya 10 cents no need no need. You use it to buy 4D, strike liao, chia uncle eat can liao ah!”


Where got such nice cabby one.

WHERE GOT.

SHB7277S

And i thoroughly enjoyed the upcoming movie NEXT at the Preview Theatre level 13 of Shaw Centre.

Complimentary tickets, courtesy by ohgenki.com!
The plot apparently is based on the book “The Golden Man” and Frank Cadalliac, (Nicholas Cage), is a man who is able to see his future 2 minutes in advance, giving him just about enough time to make life changing decisions.

And, like every hero in a movie, there is one woman who will be his nemesis. She is everything he is not. She’s sexy, beautiful, trusting and normal. He’s lupsup, psycho and so not attractive.

See what i mean?

The plot isn’t very hard to follow, considering that there can only be just about a million permutations of the future happenings, dependent on every fickle decision he makes every 2 minutes.
Nonetheless, Hollywood makes up for it by putting in the fight scene, the blowups, the car chase and the whole “save-the-world-and-let-your-loved-ones-die” turmoil.

I loved it immensely because of the way the scenes were replayed according to his clairvoyance and reality.
It is a must watch for thriller fans who love a twist and some of those hocus pocus stuff.

And of course i loved the luxurious seats, pity no popcorn allowed.

Now to check if I’ve struck 4D.

Thu
10
May '07

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巴西蜡

*************************************************************
Due to confidentiality issues, this post has to be removed.

Nonetheless, if you would like to hear about the personal process of brazillian waxing and is too shy to ask or too afraid to try it, email me@miatan.com and i can explain it to you.

If all else fails, the good waxing people at STRIP will be more than happy to guide you through to ensure a fairly painless experience.

Bring your girlfriends (or boyfriend) to hold your hand or even join you! There’s Boyzillian for the guys too!

And no, it is not THAT painful.

trust me.

Sat
5
May '07

such nice boys they are.

Crystal Mirror had their last show on Sunday, and I had prepared some gifts for the talented performers.

For Andreas, Jojo and the Twins, i put our printed photos (with some writings) and some ferrero chocolates in an envelope.
For Tom, he had his photo too, and a little extra. You know the kind of bubbles we used to blow as a kid?
Not the soapy water kind but those gooey ones that you squeeze out of a tube, wrapped around a straw and blow out a stinky bubble?
Thought he’ll have some fun with my childhood toys.

And guess what?

Andreas and Jojo emailed me!!!

Jojo’s email:

Hi Mia,

soory it´s late,
but now that I´m back in Berlin, I want to say thank U for the choclate and the lovely
pic.:-)))
I had a great time in Singapore and will definately be back…
To U I send a big smile, have fun, success and everything U wanna have!!!

Thanks again
Jojo

Andrea’s email:

Hi Mia,

thank´s for your present somebody gave me the last day at Chrystall Mirror.
We had a really good time in Singapore, now I´m back home in Berlin and I need some days to arrive really with my heart and with my soul.
I have seen on your website that you are acting and modelling, nice photos.
Wish you all the best Mia, and take care of my ping-pong-ball, Andreas

P.S. I was Monday evening for an extra event next to china town. You have seen me ?

=====================================================================

YES YES YES i did!! i bumped into him!
2 Monday evenings ago, i was walking to Tg Pagar mrt with Charmaine after work, and coming in my direction was this TALL LANKY DARK AND BROODING man with hair that will make the F4 green with jealousy.
I took a double look and even turned as he walked past.
Char looked at me and i saw the recognition in her eyes when she asked, “Isn’t that the guy, the photo with you stuck on your desk?”

Awwwww…it must have been fate.

hahahahaa.

dream on mia. dream on.